Pride, Humility, & Vulnerability

I gave a talk for the Eastlake Church young adults a few weeks ago. Here’s transcript, I hope you enjoy!

Check Out Eastlake.Young.Adults on Instagram for more pics of this ministry

Intro: Community Is a Theme Here

Community is a theme for us here. If you spend any time at all as part of this tribe, you’ll see that it’s something that we are focused on, something that we come back to, something that we are committed to creating. There are other themes. One of them is identity — who we truly are. Another is becoming more like Jesus — this is discipleship. Tonight our focus is on community. 

We Are Made for Community

Okay, let’s talk about connecting and community. This is why we are here tonight. We all have this perfect built-in weakness for one another. We need each other. There’s an on purpose, built-in need to truly know others and be truly known ourselves. Are you feeling this? I think the last year and a half has amplified this for me and for many others. So… How can this happen— how can we connect, how can we create community? And what can get in the way?

Let’s Define Pride

Let’s talk about pride for a second. I feel like this is probably the biggest obstacle to community. In fact, most sin can be traced back to pride — it’s like the foundation for many ways to go wrong. Let’s define it. What does pride mean to you? Discuss at your tables, come up with a definition, or even better come up with a story from your life when pride kept you from what you wanted. 

Craig’s Favorite Definition of Pride

Pride is disagreeing with God about who you are: 

“I give each of you this warning: Don’t think you are better than you really are. Be honest in your evaluation of yourselves, measuring yourselves by the faith God has given us.” Romans 12:3 (NLT)

Superior Pride

• Easy to spot in others

• Sometime hard to spot in ourselves, lol

• Thinking that you are better than you really are

Inferior Pride

• Can be hard to see, because it is camouflaged as “spiritual” 

• Thinking that you are worse than you are

• Can lead to becoming a doormat, to a negative cycle about your identity; poor self-image, poor self-esteem. 

• It leads to that never-ending hustle for worthiness. 

Let’s Define Humility

Okay, so if that’s what pride is, what then is humility? Can you grasp it — can you define it?

Humility is agreeing with God about who you are. 

I give each of you this warning: Don’t think you are better than you really are. Be honest in your evaluation of yourselves, measuring yourselves by the faith God has given us.” Romans 12:3 (NLT)

But there’s more to it, somehow. When we agree with God about who we are, it can change our behavior. It can help us come to terms with the reality of our identity. We can be more free to be ourselves. There’s an element of exposure to it. 

Humility is being known for who you are. 

Humility is an awareness of both strengths and weaknesses, flaws and flexes. It’s seeing ourselves in the reality of who we truly are. This can be harsh lighting. This can reveal some less than attractive stuff going on in here. And somehow, humility also acknowledges the truth of our creation — that we’re made in The Image. That there is intrinsic goodness, and that there are talents and skills that reflect God’s character and ways. 

As far as community tho, It’s the being known part that matters most. When we can be ourselves. When we can let our guard down, when we can not “armor up”, then we can truly connect. It’s this vulnerability that allows us to form community. Yes, there’s the potential to be rejected. This is the price. This is the “necessary evil” that we have to risk in order to be accepted, to feel love, and to belong. 

I know a lovely woman who for years felt like she had to “dumb it down” in order to meet guys. She felt like she had to hide her genius in order to find acceptance. I tell you the truth, she never knew if the guy actually liked her for the woman she was, or for the silly girl she was pretending to be. You can be sure only if you make sure we know you…

If you are worthy of love and belonging, then set aside your pride. Let down your guard. Let us know you. Let us know your shortcomings — but more than that, reveal to us your superpower.  

The 1 to 5 Game

At your table is a bag labeled, “The 1 to 5 Game”. Pass the bag around your table and pick out a slip of paper from in the bag. Don’t peek! Rate yourself 1 to 5 on how strongly you agree with the statement you drew. Don’t overthink it, but have a reason for your number. 

1 is Strongly Disagree, 5 is Strongly Agree

I feel accepted by others (Romans 15:7)

I feel accepted by God (Romans 15:7)

I am a child of God (John 1:12; 1 John 3:1-2)

I am a sinner (Romans 3:23)

I am made in the image of God (Genesis 1:27)

God knows who I am (Jeremiah 1:5)

I belong (1 Corinthians 12:27)

I am chosen (1 Peter 2:9)

God is alive in me (1 Corinthians 6:19-20)

Share your statement with your tablemates, tell them the number you picked and why. 

Note that there’s a Bible verse referenced on your slip. Keep this, and make a point of looking this verse up before you go to bed tonight. 

The “Who Needs This?” Game

The following statements are written on separate slips of paper in a bag on the table. Table members each take a slip, and share it aloud with the table. Then together, the table decides who needs that particular slip of paper. The idea is that the group gives that slip with that sentiment to the “right” person. The slips of paper could even be credit card sized so they easily fit in a wallet so it can serve as a reminder…

You are a joy

You are allowed to make mistakes

Your needs are a delight

You have nothing to prove

You are lovable

It is good you exist

You are good enough

Closing Thought

So pride gets in the way of our community. If we think of ourselves as better than others, we’ll act like others are not worthy of our time and attention. They’ll see this, and it will push them away. If we think of ourselves as less than, we’ll struggle with our own worthiness of connection, belonging, and love. We’ll feel this, and we’ll keep ourselves away. Humility is living in the messy reality of who we are. It recognizes flaws, sees strengths, and gives permission to grow and become. It allows us to be ourselves, and when we are ourselves, we can be known. We can experience love and belonging. It creates opportunity for right relationship — and this is unity. Let’s embrace these truths we are learning about ourselves. Let’s connect for real. 

Shakin', Waitin', and Facin' the Impossible

A Little Journey from Hebrews 12, to Psalm 40, to Exodus 4

Bible by Rod Long via Unsplash

Finding a way forward by going backwards through the Bible

New Testament: Shaking

In Hebrews 12:26-30 it says this:

The earth was rocked at the sound of his voice from the mountain, [that is Mount Sinai– Ed.] but now he has promised,

“Once and for all I will not only shake the systems of the world,

but also the unseen powers in the heavenly realm!”

Now this phrase “once and for all” clearly indicates the final removal of things that are shaking, that is, the old order, so only what is unshakeable will remain. Since we are receiving our rights to an unshakeable kingdom we should be extremely thankful and offer God the purest worship that delights his heart as we lay down our lives in absolute surrender, filled with awe. For our God is a holy, devouring fire! (TPT)

These last months have felt like God is doing some shaking. The whole earth is feeling it. Nothing humans make can stand when God shakes the earth. Normal human systems, like international airline travel, are not really functioning.

This shaking has been described as a kind of pruning. This very much resonates with me right now. My ministry, Mission Adventures is being pruned by God. But also, “I am being pruned by God”. Of course, the point of pruning is greater fruitfulness. It often does not feel pleasant, but it is certainly not punishment. This pruning is for future fruitfulness.

* * * * * * *

Psalms: Waiting

Psalm 40 is one of my favorites— in part because of the U2 song— and yes, I am that old. The song lyric parallels the psalm and it goes like this:

I waited patiently for the Lord.

He inclined and heard my cry.

He brought me up out of the pit

Out of the miry clay.

I will sing, sing a new song.

I will sing, sing a new song.

How long to sing this song?

How long to sing this song?

How long, how long, how long

How long to sing this song?

I just love the idea of singing a new song… I went to a U2 concert, back when we could go to things like concerts. And it was special. They started their tour here in San Diego, and on that first night, the last song they played was this song 40. As they repeated the chorus again, the whole arena, 18,000 people, all sang it together. One by one, the band members walked off stage as the lights came on. Yet, the crowed kept singing, repeating the chorus, “I will sing, sing a new song…” For more than two minutes, thousands of voices rang out with the words to this psalm. It was magical. For me it was a moment of public worship, and the presence of God was thick.

Note the first part of that song: “I waited patiently for the Lord...” and, “He inclined and heard my cry”. These are direct quotes from Psalm 40. I feel like that’s what these last 40+ days have been about. It’s been a forced waiting. And it’s been a good waiting. God has been anything but silent since the world has stopped. He’s been speaking and speaking and speaking. I’ve been overwhelmed with many wonderful messages, both through my church, and through Youth With A Mission. God has been calling me to himself and he’s asked me to wait patiently while he instructs me. I believe God is using this pandemic to prune my normal life away, to limit me, so that I can only abide in him. And he’s let the floodgates loose of such good words to me. I’ve collected 8 YWAM messages and put them all on this page here. 

* * * * * * *

Facing the Impossible

Which brings us to Exodus. God spoke to Moses from a burning bush that wasn’t consumed. Curious, Moses approached and heard the Voice. In the presence of the Holy, Moses showed that he had no status here, and no holiness of his own. He took off his sandals. And in his conversation with I AM, Moses explained to God why facing the impossible wasn’t going to work:

Moses objected, “They won’t trust me. They won’t listen to a word I say. They’re going to say, ‘God? Appear to him? Hardly!’”

So God said, “What’s that in your hand?”

“A staff.”

“Throw it on the ground.” He threw it. It became a snake; Moses jumped back—fast!

God said to Moses, “Reach out and grab it by the tail.” He reached out and grabbed it—and he was holding his staff again. “That’s so they will trust that God appeared to you, the God of their fathers, the God of Abraham, the God of Isaac, and the God of Jacob.” Exodus 4:1-5 (The Message)

God asked something impossible of Moses. He said, “Go tell pharaoh... “ Moses tried to get out of it. There’s part of me that can’t believe Moses argued with God! Who does Moses think he is to tell God to send someone else? How do you encounter a burning bush, a holy presence, and hear a voice and then have the guts to say, “No.”? Yet, I realize this is me too. I am the same as Moses— too many times I have said no to God because I don’t think I can do it. 

So God asked Moses, “What do you have in your hand?” What a strange question. Obviously, he had a staff— a shepherd’s crook. He used it daily to support himself as he walked the miles. He used it to guide sheep, tapping and nudging them. He used it to whack predators. It was his tool. It was a symbol of his job, his status, and experience. It represented his skills and what he thought he was capable of doing. 

God told Moses to throw it down. What Moses had was not enough. He was going to need more. So he threw it down and the staff became a snake. This was a demonstration of God’s power. It was a kind of promise that God would be with him, and a foreshadowing of God doing it again in pharaoh’s throne room. God first asks Moses to do the impossible. Then he asks him to lay down his experience, his status symbol, his tools, and his skills. The new thing God was asking of Moses would require something more than a shepherd’s staff. It would require someone more than a shepherd. Does this sound familiar? Does this rhyme with your life right now?

It got worse. God asked him to pick up the snake. Gulp! This sounds dangerous. It’s a challenge, and like Moses, we have to ask ourselves if we are willing to do something, bold and daring when God asks. Moses obeyed and the serpent turned back into a staff. It wasn’t a shepherd’s staff any longer. It had become the prophet’s rod. At God’s command, Moses would raise this rod and seas would part. At God’s command, water would flow from a rock. Moses would lead his people out of Egypt with this tool. When he picked up the snake, he picked up a new anointing. He went from the keeper of sheep, to the prophet-leader of an entire people.

* * * * * * *

In many ways, this is us. We are going through a shaking. We have been waiting. And God has given us an impossible task. He’s called me to be a missionary in a time when there is no travel. Perhaps he’s called you to figure out a way to move forward in a place where we cannot be face-to-face. I have a sense that God is up to something. He’s called us to himself, he’s given us his word, and he’s awaiting our response. Maybe you’re holding on to your shepherd’s staff wondering if you can throw it down. Maybe you felt like you were barely qualified to do what you were doing the old way. And maybe now it seems impossible to figure out how to do the new thing in a new way. 

I say, throw down your staff. Throw down your experience. Throw down what you think you’re capable of. Witness the miracle and power of God. Pick it up. Pick up that prophet’s rod and rely on him to work the impossible through you! 

30 Days and 30 Posts

We Posted Every Day in April!

Even just a couple of weeks later, I’m seeing this as an interesting record of our responses in these interesting times.

We’ve collected these April posts on one page here so you can check them out.

Feeding the Few Thousand

This Morning I Helped Out at Community Through Hope

Folks lined up around the block, and Chula Vista PD officers helped distribute food too

They’ve halted all their regular programs and have focussed all their efforts to be a food distribution point in our city.

Folks lined up in the early hours. By the time I showed up at 6:20, the line of cars wrapped around the block. About fifteen or so volunteers, many of them regulars, came in early to set up the distribution line. Fruits, veggies, canned goods, pasta, and even precious bacon were set out ready and made ready to give away. A number of volunteers were designated as ‘runners’. They’d greet the vehicle, and put the goods in the back seat or trunk. Once the line got started, even Chula Vista Police Officers got involved in the distribution.

This was fun for me. I was out of the house. I got to interact with people. But most of all, I finally felt like I was doing something useful again. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve been relatively productive these last six weeks. But it was so good to do something for folks in need.

My something was to move 50 pound boxes of frozen chicken from the freezer to the table. I didn’t think to count when I started, but I’m pretty sure we distributed nearly 2,000 pounds of chicken in two hours. I got to work with new friends Melissa and Ron both of whom attend Eastlake Church.

I also got to meet Bella. Her mom founded Community Through Hope around seven years ago. Last year they moved into a facility in our old neighborhood. Bella had been living and working in San Francisco, but when the crisis hit, she just had to come home and help out.

I’m reminded of the time when the disciples came to Jesus with a problem. He had been teaching a big crowd, but it was getting late. Matthew records it in chapter 14:

When it was almost evening, the disciples came to him. “There is nothing here,” they said. “It’s already getting late. Send the crowds away. They can go and buy some food in the villages.”

Jesus replied, “They don’t need to go away. You give them something to eat.”

I love that Jesus said, “You do it”. Of course, it would take a miracle, but he still wanted us to do it. I feel like I was a part of something like that today. It’s a miracle that Community Through Hope had so much food to give. And it’s a miracle that together, we fed so many people today.

Beautiful Information and Good News

I’m a Visual Guy. I Like Photography, Pretty Colors and Even Word Pictures

Graph from Information is Beautiful

And that’s part of the reason that I’m loving this graph from Information is Beautiful

The other reason is because it looks like in a lot of places that the curve is flattening. I’m hopeful this means we can come out of our houses now. I know that a flatter curve doesn’t mean that we’ve beat the coronavirus, but I think it means a lot fewer people will suffer. I think it means our healthcare systems won’t be overwhelmed, (unless we’re unwise, of course).

Beautiful News

I’m also a fan of their Beautiful News Daily feed on Instagram. It seems like their mission is to find the positive data and present it beautifully. I find it’s a nice antidote to The Media’s seemingly endless supply of not so beautiful news. Here are two of their recent posts:

Some Good News

Which brings me to John Krasinski’s Some Good News. I’ve watched every episode, and each one gets me all misty-eyed. If you are one of the 17 people on planet Earth who have not seen this, get to clickin’!

I feel like I need more stuff like this. I need some beauty. I need some good news. I don’t want to use these things to completely shut out the bad news of suffering. I also need to remain sensitized to reality and to the struggle that so many are going through. But it’s not wrong to look for positive things in the midst of this difficulty. Thanks Info is Beautiful and John Krasinski for making our world a bit brighter!

We Are Thankful for Opportunities to Be Generous

We Got Our Stimulus Check from the U.S. Government and We Are Setting Some Aside

We Are Giving to Three Initiatives that Help the Most Vulnerable.

Would you prayerfully consider joining us? We are giving gifts to help the poor in India, in Mexico, and in San Francisco. The one-minute video above is our friend Anil who is meeting the needs of the poor in Vizag India.

Photo: Loren Joseph via Unsplash

Vizag India

Our friend and partner in the Mission Adventures Network is serving the poor by providing food for those affected by the COVID 19 crisis. Many are out of work and unable to provide food for their families. Some are going to bed hungry. Others contemplate suicide. It’s bad. But Anil and his team of YWAMers are distributing food to those in need.

Photo: Sydney Rae via Unsplash

Baja Mexico

We here at YWAM San Diego Baja are reaching out to our neighbors in need. Like in India, many are unable to make enough money to feed their families because of shelter-in-place orders. Already our teams have been delivering rice, beans, and other staples to those in need.

Photo by Ev via Unsplash

San Francisco

The YWAM center in the heart of the Tenderloin district is serving the unhoused population. They offer showers and simple meals to those trying to shelter in tents on the streets. They’re distributing produce and other foodstuffs to the elderly and others suffering economic hardships.*

You can be a part of these vital relief ministries and meet real needs of real people affected by the pandemic.

Your gift, large or small, will go directly to those in need. As you may know, the Youth With A Mission staff who are administering your gift and distributing the food are unpaid volunteer missionaries. So zero of your dollars go to a payroll making sure that your gift has maximum impact.

The Food for India and the Food for Baja links above will take you to YWAM San Diego Baja’s web site. Simply choose the “General Donations” link and write in “Food for India” or “Food for Baja” in the box provided. The San Francisco link will take you to YWAM San Francisco’s web site. Simply click the “Donate” link to participate.

*You may recall that I’ve already written about our fantastic YWAM team in San Francisco:

• Let’s Remember Everyone in these Coronavirus Times

• Not All Heroes Are Doctors or Nurses

Some Thoughts on The Media

So it Might Be a Big Mistake to Write about The Media in These Supercharged Times

Brad Pitt as Dr. Fauci

But Right Now I Find Myself Feeling the Need to Know More Acutely

I Am Allergic to Politics and the Media

You should know this before I get started. I tend to be allergic to politics and what I’m calling, The Media. Part of it is all the drama, (rolls eyes). Part of it is that I often feel manipulated in these arenas. I have a tendency to believe that I’m not getting quality info, and that makes it hard to make good decisions. So I break out in a metaphysical rash and avoid both of them as much as possible. Don’t get me wrong, I vote. I read. I participate in our democracy, but ewwww.

So despite my allergy, I find myself consuming more of The Media’s output in these corona-times. Try as I might, I can’t avoid the sound of the president’s voice as he holds his daily briefings. I can’t not see the headlines making fun of him for what he says or doesn’t. And there are the daily zillion hot takes and insta-punditry happening 24/7. But I tune in anyway, because I still have a need to know.  

What’s That Sound?

It’s a low moaning sound. I hear a lot of moaning in and via The Media. Politicians moan that The Media is against them. And it seems to me that each generation of politician thinks that The Media is out to get them and that this is new and that no other generation of politicians has had to deal with this level of nastiness. And The Media itself seems to have taken on some whine-y tones too. There’s much complaining going back and forth, and maybe some people love it. It punches up the show with drama, right?! Ugh, I’m starting to feel itchy again. 

This is not a new problem. When liberals are in charge, they complain of vast right wing conspiracies. When conservatives are in charge they complain that the liberal media is out to get them. Certainly the complaining about The Media has been a consistent song that’s been sung for at least a couple of generations.

Antagonism On Purpose

Perhaps this is by design— not the whining and complaining, but the antagonism. Isn’t it the purpose of The Media to challenge government? We sometimes refer to The Media as the fourth estate. And it seems to me, that a free press in a democracy is meant to be a kind of buffer between the power and the person. It’s meant to be a defense from an overbearing government’s trespass into the domains of families and individuals. It’s meant to be a shield. We said no to King George. We designed a government with separated powers (legislative, judicial, and executive), with checks and balances on purpose. And this purpose was to do our best to protect people from the abuse of power. In the same way, a fourth estate is meant to preserve the sanctity of family and person. 

So does this mean things are right after all? Could this be the way it is supposed to be? As I see it, a free press is meant to serve by informing the public and by challenging government and governors. But I am uneasy. Have we lost a free press? I’m not saying that the government is controlling media as happens in China. But something has happened.  

CNN Happened

A claim can be made that this is all CNN’s fault. And I mean to be a bit cheeky, but I don’t mean to say that this is a left or a liberal problem. If Fox had been first, we’d have the same issue. The dawn of the cable era witnessed the birth of the 24 hour news cycle. We connected the cables to our TVs and we accelerated the creation of the news as an industry. We’ve chosen an industry instead of an estate. Maybe because ESPN and HGTV were bundled, we just couldn’t resist.

The Paper Didn’t Happen

Well, I guess I really blame the death of the paper. People don’t read anymore. (Not true, but true-ish, right?) I suppose printed news was already pressured by televised news, but they seemed to coexist. We all watched it on TV, and then read about it the next morning. This seemed to work. Televised immediacy brought us the happening. Printed analysis brought the why and how of it. And then the internet. Here’s a graph of what happened next:

Newspaper Revenue 1980-2020

A totally made up and non scientific graph that is somehow still true. It may also be true-ish for Walkman purchases, AOL users, and Beanie Baby Collecters…

Clicks and Likes Happened

In an effort to survive the revenue-carnage created by the internet, print media and journalism had to change. This further accelerated the shift from estate to industry. And this new industry was based on clicks and likes. All of us got to vote on what we wanted to see, hear, and read. I don’t have time to go into it, but in my mind Facebook is a nearly criminal enterprise. (I guess google that—or better yet, DuckDuckGo.com it, because they won’t track you). Facebook’s quest for engagement created algorithms that amplified news as industry... For more, you gotta read my man Ben Thomson at Stratechery. 

Op/Ed Punditry Sound Bites

It seems that we now have an industry that I’m calling The Media. It is tuned to create op/ed punditry sound bites and little else. Maybe that’s an overly harsh criticism of the state of things, I don’t know. I’m saying this as an observer and as a user. I think we are missing something. We deserve more than this, and we’ve got to find a way forward. Lord help us pivot towards a journalism that functions like an estate.